Hey Courtney

Hey Courtney,

Didn’t you see the way he broke

After his parents wrapped around that tree?

The blank slate of his face when you said it was on purpose.

Did you cry when they found that boy’s body floating on the lake?

Hey Courtney,

How many times did you throw cupcakes at Alison H.?

Did you get a kick when she slit her wrists and nearly died?

 Hey Courtney,

Your heart is a box that hasn’t been unlocked in so long.

Can’t you feel anything?

When you’re having sex with your best friend’s ex are there any regrets?

The videotape he made recorded everything.

Hey Courtney,

The tape wasn’t the only thing made that night.

Hey Courtney,

Even though you should feel lost and alone

You’re too busy drinking your worries away.

Don’t you see that if you keep this up the baby won’t be okay?

Hey Courtney,

You drive to the clinic to get something done

About that baby bump.

Hey Courtney,

Were you sober enough to see the headlights?

Hey Courtney,

Shadows dance before your eyes.

Your whole body aches and you finally worry about the other life inside.

You’re wheeled to the maternity ward.

Vomit stains the hospital floor.

You scream as they yell push!

Hey Courtney,

Cradling that piece of magic in your aching arms,

You think to yourself that nothing could go wrong.

Hey Courtney,

You don’t care that he has his father’s eyes.

All you see is that God sent you an angel in disguise.

Your life’s on a new course;

You’ll say you’re sorry to all you’ve wronged.

Thinking of the drowning, you hold up the babe.

“Daniel-James is your name.”

But, hey Courtney,

Daniel-James was three months early.


Can’t you see that this isn’t the end?

Even though he’s entangled in tubes, he’ll be alright.

You’ll be alright.

Copyright © 2016 by Nita Pan

All rights reserved.  This post or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a review.

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