You Are Madness

I feel you:

deep in my bones

drifting like a ghost

through the walls of

my crumbling home.


a place with four battered walls

sunken in places from our fists.

A thread of my best black dress

is still stuck to a nail

from where you shoved

me up against the wall.

You tore at my bodice

with your teeth that night,

and held me in place

with your eyes.

Oh fuck,

your eyes

undo me

as your lips abuse me.

We roll around

in between yellowing sheets,

and you sleep soundly after.

I can’t close my eyes;

heaven knows what

might happen if I do.

But you look so peaceful,

and I can’t get the memory

of your hands on me,

in me,

out of my head.

I should’ve run;

You are madness.

I knew from the

moment that I looked into

your dark eyes

that you’d be the

death of me.

You felt my need,

and saved the girl I was.

Now I’m a monster

just like you.

Copyright © 2019 by Nita Pan

All rights reserved. This post or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a review

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